My Blog

I read today that there was a new baby aardvark born in Longleat zoo in the UK recently.  As an adult it is such a strange looking animal and I am not sure if it looks any better as a new-born. I suppose if it ate frogs instead of ants its nose would look different. But that’s nature for you.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.somersetlive.co.uk/whats-on/whats-on-news/longleat-announces-arrival-first-ever-4660986.amp

Whenever I hear the word ‘Aardvark’ I am forever reminded that it is the first word in the English dictionary and a funny word that I love. My memory then immensively goes to the Blackadder sketch where Samuel Johnson has just written the first English dictionary. Blackadder then proceeds to take great delight in messing with his head by conjusting meaningless words on the spot. Such as the ones that I have just mentioned.

https://youtu.be/PuDquo76490

Making up words is an acquired skill and one that I am working on. Weaving them into a conversation whilst keeping a straight face is possibly the most charvasing  skill but once attained I am sure that it is well worth the effort.

Hugh Laurie as the Prince Regent in Black adder is one of my favorite characters ever. It is not hard to believe that he went onto international superstardom with the series ‘House’. The writing of Blackadder was (in my mind) in the realm of Monty Python.   Just pure redulcitrant silliness underscored by genius writing.

How many made up words did you find in this blog?

That’s all for now

My sincerest contrafibularities

Stay fab

Adele

 

I have to admit I have never been a huge Benedict Cumberbatch fan. However, this clip posted on YouTube has managed to convince me otherwise. Benedict reads a letter from the Artist Sol LeWitt to his friend and fellow artist Eva Hesse. The content of the letter as well as the reading are awe inspiring.

Lately there seems to be an abundance of books and video clips illuminating the benefits of putting oneself first to achieve greater fulfillment in life.  ‘Untamed ‘By Glennon Doyle was promoted by the singer Adele as she states that it helped change her priorities.

It promises that in prioritizing oneself over others and setting boundaries we will all become more centered and less stressed.

One of the video clips that always succeeds in de stressing and making me smile is this clip from Graham Norton. In it Graham challenges Benedict to perform his best otter impersonations as requested by fans due to an uncanny resemblance.

And I was otterly amazed at his mimicry (Pun therapy continues but is largely unsuccessful)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QO5VxVDmsG4

It was of course only fitting to end the interview by committing grievous bodily harm to an enormous teddy bear. I almost could not bear to watch.

Perhaps it is his name that I cannot seem to relate to?  I am pretty sure that he is not losing any sleep over whether I like him or not. I feel for him as growing up must have been more complicated than most considering his rather unusual name.

Most kids get teased but his taunts must have been off the Richter scale. Perhaps the following may have been some of the names that he was called. Been a dick cumbersome snatch?   Been a dick come to bitch?

Anyhoo, I am off to watch him in the ‘Imitation Game’ as somebody recommended it, as long as there are plenty of otters in it and that he is imitating them beautifully.

 

That’s all for now.

Have a great day.

Stay fab.

Adele

 

I wrote this poem today as whenever I am by the sea it’s beauty and majesty never cease to take my breath away. One of my favorite quotes ‘So many things are locked in wordlessness’ which is a Steinback quote, aptly names the experience.

As well as a recent phrase I read which described humans as being limited by our senses. Words cannot even begin to describe the experience but I had to try. I hope you enjoy.

 

Abalone Sea

My soul wails seeking solace

From the grime and the menace

As I hear the ocean chorus

I am drawn to my bliss

The gulls call me

Beckoning to their abalone sea

Aqua marine soul energy

Clambering through the dunes joyfully

My bare feet curl on the ribs of sand

I witness the ocean wave its cresting hand

The graceful sea grass whispers to my mind

Taste the sea air, inhale, unwind.

My angst begins to unfurl

My empty shell becoming impearled

The ocean’s labradorite hues become my world

As I glisten within becoming a little girl

My top 10 videos of lockdown from Twitter to Tiktok

1. Sock puppet eating cars – https://twitter.com/gnuman1979/status/1239523796542992387?s=27
2. Dog sliding downstairs with his testicles trailing behind him

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSpsUYqp/

3. A swan feeding fish

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSpM4WDY/

4. Different pets playing together

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSpe48eW/

5. Messy baby

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSpddDNt/

6. Ali G roasting the Beckhams

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSCKV9BC/

7. Panda eating, just because……….

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSCKscBK/

8. Whales shallow feeding

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSCKt8dA/

9. Ten men on a rope swinging-really has to be seen to be believed,

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSCKCmsS/

10. Comedienne ‘Sarah Millican’ just too funny and rude

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZSC3dbJF/

 

That’s all for now.

Have a great day.

Stay fab.

Adele

 

Today I was reminded of an incident in Howth whilst walking Buzz and Finn last week with my friend that made me smile. I was walking up Howth Hill and Finn had a small dose of diarrhea which needed tending to as some of it went onto his back leg. I had a tissue in the pocket of my coat which I took out and began to wipe the smear off the back of his leg.

Whilst I was down there, I also decided to give a little wipe to his tail end. As I completed the act whilst standing up, I became aware of cars driving past. I realized that there was a distinct probability that someone in a car had the misfortune of witnessing me wiping my dog’s arse with a tissue.

Last week there was another incident regarding Buzz. I was with my friend and again we are walking up the hill when a couple of ladies passed us by. My friend was walking Buzz for me as I had Finn. Buzz pooped. There was nothing odd about the event other than the fact that I picked it up and bagged it.

Again, I couldn’t help but think of what the two ladies were thinking. Probably something along the lines of ‘My, now, that’s true friendship, where she picks up her friend’s dog’s poop’, not realizing that it is my dog.

Perhaps I should have apprehended them to explain the situation but I am pretty sure it would have only made things look weirder than they already were.

That’s all for now.

Have a great day.

Stay fab.

Adele

 

 

This is a pervading and persistent affliction previously coined by the Viz Profanisaurus. Arse-ritis has now reared its ugly head again during Covid lockdown.  The condition is identified by stiffness of limbs due to not being arsed to do an awful lot.

Sufferers also complain of procrastination and frustration. Frustration is primarily aimed at Netflix due to the lack of entertainment on offer, particularly when every single item has been watched by the sufferer (and critiqued on IMDB).

Regular exercise and a reduction in complex carbohydrates have been shown to diminish the symptoms somewhat. Severe hand cramp related to excessive remote-control usage can almost disappear.

Emergency departments around the country have also seen a marked increase in patients presenting with finger-itis. Some patients have required surgical removal from their mobile phones and speech therapy to allow them to learn to speak to another human face to face.

The minister for health has been contacted regarding issuing a statement but it appears now that he may also be showing symptoms of this cruel condition as he is unavailable to comment.

The department of health have also been contacted regarding launching an awareness campaign but sadly they too have been affected by this condition.    All we can do now is pray for a cure.

That’s all for now.

Have a great day.

Stay fab.

Adele

 

( Ref VIZ ‘ Profanisaurus War and Piss)

 

http://viz.co.uk/category/rogers-profanisaurus/

 

When I was a nurse training in Ballinasloe there were two night clubs that we always frequented.  The Palm Club and was in Hayden’s hotel which was very well known for many many years but is sadly no more.  The other was the East County – less well known- which was in the East County Hotel.

Our weekly frolics were best described as heading to ‘The Palm for a man’ and ‘The East for a beast’- a phrase coined by my good self. Following a night on the beer, boogying and throwing shapes we would all then head to the local Burger bar which was called Mighty Bite. However, we had to rename it to Mighty Shite as the burgers weren’t the best. I was a woeful word play artist even back then. Just couldn’t help myself.

There were two giant artificial palm trees outside The Palm Club where love stories and shifting began.    They must have been 6 feet tall, weighed a ton and one of them got pinched one night.

I often think what the thief’s must have said to the Garda if they had been apprehended.? Would they have remarked when asked ‘What have we here fellas, what’s with the palm trees?’

‘Sorry Garda but the two girls we were with would only promise to shift us if we brought this back to their back garden’. They were never returned- the palm trees- and we all really missed them.

 

That’s all for now.

Have a great day.

Stay fab.

Adele

 

The sea was cold today. But as always, invigorating. Once or twice, it has been so cold that my skin stings but thankfully today was not one of them. I let Buzz and Finn loose, and they were ecstatic. Whilst picking up Buzz’s poo from the pebble beach I had to pick up a few of the stones that it had landed on as he had done quite an effective stone smearing job.

It reminded me of a story when my brother, his wife and their young children went on a picnic to the beach. They had to scale a bit of a cliff to get down to the beach. At the end of the day, they packed up and headed back up the cliff to their car.

When my brother reached the car, he was perplexed as the backpack he was carrying was very heavy. Having eaten their picnic he had thought that there would be less weight to carry back up to the car.

He remarked to his wife’, Crikey,   what have you got in here? rocks?’. She didn’t reply as she was getting the children into the car. He asked her again. She peered over the roof of the car and said, ‘No, I don’t think so, have a look’. He opened the bag and it was full of rocks.

His beautiful wife was in stitches when she recounted this story to me.Just as she was on the day, she filled the bag with rocks.  My brother was able to laugh about it too but it may have taken a little time on the journey home for him to get the joke.

 

Time

So little, so much

Gone in a touch

A joy to behold

One second, sold

Always taken

Forgotten soul awakening

The greatest gift

To heal a rift

Used to fear or love

You are enough

In this moment given once

Will you cower, or will you dance?

This moment has no limits

Will you reach your personal summit?

By

Adele Leahy

 

Over fifty homeless people have died so far this year. Two were found this week. Both men in their early 40’s. I saw three tents on Malahide beach last week. It is too sad.

 

Shelter

Seek shelter

Away from the

Helter Skelter

Of my mind

Too often unkind

Meeting strangers

Asking for money

My pride is my badge

It’s just for tea

Not for drugs

Do you think I am a mug?

My cup does not runneth over

Am not in possession

Of a four-leaf clover

The luck of the Irish

My arse

My luck is a cardboard box

And food that is scarce

I don’t belong

In a world that does not care

That cannot distinguish

My pavement body

On the footpath

Do the math

Two euro to feed me

Don’t heed me

Look away

Consider

Am I worth?

Two euro

Or shall I wither?

By

Adele Leahy