Happy Christmas 2023

Happy Christmas. It’s been a cracker, I have had my icy swim, lots of lovely grub, a few beach doggy walks, and now for the swan dive onto the sofa and some TV binge watching….

My home looks like Santa’s grotto and my external Christmas lights are impressive. Even my neighbour remarked on them.

This year everyone has made much more of an effort with their lights and Christmas decorations. I love walking Buzz&Finn late at night to see all the different lights, flashing, twinkling, and sparkling.

I am feeling festive overall but can vacillate between joy and sadness as the day has glimmers (the opposite of triggers) as well as triggers.

Buzz and Finn look pretty cool in their Christmas jumpers too. My favorite movies to watch at this time of year are


  1. The Sound of Music
  2. The Wizard of Oz
  3. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

I have been watching them all since I was a little girl and I still adore them and know all of the songs.

This year my friend and her father watched It’s a Wonderful Life, at The 1920’s ( One hundred year old) Art Deco Stella Cinema in Rathmines. We had such a lovely time as I had forgotten what a lovely movie it was.


Happy Christma

All the best

Stay fab


Happy Winter Solstice 2023

I believe that little people or people of short stature regard this day as the most important day in their year as being short in stature they feel in alignment with the universe and the shortest day of the year. For many, it can resemble Comic Con as they dress up as the seven dwarfs, leprechauns, the munchkins, and the Oompa Loompas,

People who are not genetically little people but are very short in stature all gather for a Short Festival on the grounds of the Kilkenny Festival in Ireland. No one over the age of eighteen can attend and you must be under five feet. They play dare games, by somebody drawing the short straw and attend cookery classes where they perfect their shortbread skills in baking.

I must apologise, and please do not get short with me but everything written above is complete and utter codswallop. However, what is written below is true.

The shortest day of the year is very short indeed. And according to Irish myth, the evenings will now get longer every night by a cock’s step. This means that each evening will be lengthened by two minutes each day or an hour each month. It appears that it has been said in almost every county in Ireland.


Happy Winter Solstice

All the best

Stay fab


Short Story Flashing Pope

I thought you might like to read my short story, Flashing Pope, which was published this time last year in the Alternating Current Anthology edited by Alan McMunnugal and his team at www.thi-wurd.com. I visited Glasgow for the launch which is truly a spectacular city. It was a privilege to read my story at this time and when I returned in April for the re-launch.


Short Story Flashing Pope


I was 13 and it was 1983 in a boy’s only Christian brother school disco called ‘The Oasis’ in Dublin. Shalimar’s ‘Make This a Night to Remember’ was playing and I was sitting on the lap of Dave Savage as he surreptitiously fanny fiddled me. I wasn’t sure whether I liked it or not. A great uncle had done it to me when I was seven and it never felt right. But in The Oasis that night it didn’t matter as I liked him, the song and enjoyed my first snog. Although his tongue was a bit like a snake. The picture of the Pope on the wall behind the DJ was flashing. It was illuminated by the strobe lights.

A few of the Christian brothers were milling about watching out for untoward behaviour. One of them came over to us as the savage finger was rather swiftly removed from my pants. I jumped off his lap and went looking for my friends to delight in relaying my snogging news.

Every time I see a picture of the Pope now, I think of the savage fanny fiddler and say a prayer for his wellbeing along with my great uncle. It sounds like a great name for a new Irish Trad band ‘Savage Fanny Fiddler’. I tried various things throughout my life from nursing to webcam nursing fetishism. Which incidentally was a great earner but didn’t do a huge amount for my self-esteem. The sexy nurse and nun fetish is remarkably popular online. The ones that paid the most asked for the nurse-nun hybrid. I always got a kick out of it. However, in the end, none of it nourished my soul.

Everything came full circle when I finally returned to my childhood wish of becoming a nun. I spent a month as a guest in The Abbey to see whether it was for me. Followed by another 6 months and then one month at home to finally consider the new life I was about to begin. It’s not exactly the Nonnberg Abbey from The Sound of Music but it is a beautiful Abbey all the same in a lovely village in County Wexford in Ireland. Sisters of Mercy is my order which incidentally was my favorite band.

This morning I attended a funeral of one of the postulants. She had been a dear friend and confidante and was forever asking me to change my name from Sister Mary Felician to Sister Mary. She knew that one of the reasons I chose it was because it reminded me of the word fellatio. She reasoned that choosing a nun’s name based on the fact that it reminded me of a rude word was not very nun-like. I could see her point but the imp in me still loved to announce my name proudly whenever asked and smile inwardly at my mental wordplay.

Whilst they were lowering the coffin into the ground, I had to stop myself from smiling. I asked Pat the Butcher earlier on this morning how he was and he replied

‘Ah, above the ground’.

As opposed to the usual stock answer

‘Ah, I’m grand’.

I laughed as I had never heard it before. He told me that he saw it on some Irish TV programme. That was all I could think of whilst they were lowering Sr. Eustace. I think I have always used humour to deal with sad situations. To stop myself from smiling I had to think of all the places where you could not use this response. The following came to mind -The Underground in the UK, The Metro in France, coal mining in Australia, Cave diving, Scuba diving, post-apocalypse in a bunker and at a funeral. Definitely not at a funeral.

I enjoy lectio divina- where we study scripture and contemplate in the library- as it stops my mind from wandering to unholy things. A picture of Pope Francis hangs above my bed as I enjoy praying to him. My niece bought me a miniature disco ball as a joke when I announced my intention to become a nun. She said that I could recreate the ‘silent disco’ atmosphere in my room when I needed a break from being so holy. I couldn’t throw it away when I was ordained.

The magic mushroom kit that I bought online has paid dividends. They grow so well under my bed in the cool shade. Sr. Bernadette is a great pal and I have nicknamed her ‘Cupcake’ as she loves them. Particularly the red velvet ones that I make when I can have the kitchen to myself. The first time she had one she said that eating it was like a religious experience which gave us the giggles. We get together tonight as it is Saturday for a catch-up after evening Mass and our seventh period of prayers. I made the cupcakes early this morning at 3 am so that the oven could cool down before I could be found out as everyone rises for the first prayer at 4 am. I have added a few ‘shrooms’ as usual and cannot wait until we get off our merry tits on them. With the flashing Pope giving us his blessing and the disco light on the bible on top of my bedside locker. Our evening is always prefaced by a mutual orgasmic fanny fiddle.


All the best

Stay fab


World’s Oldest Dog, Bobi Dies at 31years

This has to be one of my favourite and saddest stories of 2023. Favourite because I cannot believe that a dog lived to the ripe age of thirty-one. And saddest because he has sadly passed away. I have always believed that, besides exercise and food, dogs live on love. They give so much of it unconditionally, that if they receive it in return they will live as long as they need to.


He was a purebred of the Rafeiro do Alentejo breed named Bobi. This breed normally has a life expectancy of between twelve and fourteen years. The Portuguese government’s pet database and the National Union of Veterinarians confirmed his birth date.

 He beat the record previously held by Bluey, aged 29 years and five months, an Australian cattle dog who died in 1939. Bobi lived in the small rural village of Conqueiros in Portugal. His long life was attributed to being fed regular food eaten by his owners and roaming free around the land of the Costa family.

The loss of a pet is always devastating to any family but in this case, I am sure they still miss him terribly but realise how blessed they were for their beautiful dog to live for more than twice his normal life span.

They really are our furry angels. They are happy to give and receive lots of love and cuddles once they are fed a nutritious diet and exercised regularly.

All the best

Stay fab