Just because the youngsters have text short codes. Why can’t we?
Menopause text short codes
HFF-Hot feckin flush
FBSC-Feeling bat shit crazy
HATB-Head about to burst
FIWHF -Feckin insomnia with hot flush
The menopause is rather undignified and relentless. Nobody escapes. My favorite symptoms are the sweats. Whenever I get them, I resemble Shrek in a sauna. I have reached a point of indifference as fretting just leads to more sweating. They say that men sweat and ladies’ glow. No shit Sherlock. I don’t so much glow as glare.
Menopause Blues
The frustration with the perspiration makes me feel flushed away.
And my emotions in disarray.
I was going to write a poem about it but my hormonal and neurotic mind got in the way.
I am full of hot air and feeling the blues.
It’s taking all of my energy not to blow a feckin fuse.
There, I feel better now, with that off my sweaty chest. My menopause minx always knows best.
Where is The Menopause Minx, aka TMM, when I need her, eh? Could we please have her as a modern-day Superhero-Purleeasse.
She would be my ultimate superhero. Blowing ice cold air onto me when I am mid hot flush. Giving me extra strength to pull on my spanx when I have over indulged the day before? Providing me with a somewhat rational mind when my emotions are off the Richter scale. I’m off now to blow that fuse I have been promising myself all day. I deserve it.
That’s all for now.
Have a great day.
Stay fab.
Adele
