The Menopause Minx

Just because the youngsters have text short codes. Why can’t we?

 Menopause text short codes

HFF-Hot feckin flush

FBSC-Feeling bat shit crazy

HATB-Head about to burst

FIWHF -Feckin insomnia with hot flush


The menopause is rather undignified and relentless. Nobody escapes. My favorite symptoms are the sweats. Whenever I get them, I resemble Shrek in a sauna. I have reached a point of indifference as fretting just leads to more sweating. They say that men sweat and ladies’ glow. No shit Sherlock. I don’t so much glow as glare.

Menopause Blues

The frustration with the perspiration makes me feel flushed away.

 And my emotions in disarray.

I was going to write a poem about it but my hormonal and neurotic mind got in the way.

I am full of hot air and feeling the blues.

 It’s taking all of my energy not to blow a feckin fuse.



There, I feel better now, with that off my sweaty chest.   My menopause minx always knows best.

Where is The Menopause Minx, aka TMM, when I need her, eh? Could we please have her as a modern-day Superhero-Purleeasse.

She would be my ultimate superhero.    Blowing ice cold air onto me when I am mid hot flush.  Giving me extra strength to pull on my spanx when I have over indulged the day before?  Providing me with a somewhat rational mind when my emotions are off the Richter scale. I’m off now to blow that fuse I have been promising myself all day. I deserve it.


That’s all for now.

Have a great day.

Stay fab.