The following is written from the perspective of the man who married his dog
( See May 2nd and 9th blogs) and is a purely fictional account of the event.
Can you count all the puns?
I was a bit husky and melon collie following a big nite out and lab dance. Doesn’t really mutter. But being hungover I em-barked upon my idea to marry my dog. Many people poo pood the idea. They said it was lunacy and impawsible. In life I take the woof with the smooth and rarely unleash my crazy side but as I love my dog so much, I felt it was my life’s pawpose to marry him.
Some said to call the Dogtor. Conventional dog-ma does not concern me. I didn’t care. Before I asked for Honey’s paw in marriage I thought – Howl I ever live without you?
Gladly Honey said ‘yes’ and gave me a’ Honey facial special’ in thanks. Next, I called all my friends. Some were surprised. One said he thought I was having him on and I said
‘I shih-tzu not!
My friends, the ‘pawty people’ were all delighted to attend the wedding.
Our first dance was our favourite ‘ Don’t collie me maybe ‘ by Carly Rae Jepson.
Other hits that were played included the most obvious floor filler
-Who. let the dogs out, followed by
-The Beagles-Set list
-Don’t stop retrieving
-Pink Floyd- Bark side of the moon
-Elvis-You ain’t nothing but a pound dog
-I like big mutts and I cannot lie
-Puptown girl
-The Border Collie ( The Borders by Sam Fender)
After the wedding we watched Jurassic Bark, Marley and me and Mary Puppins. We had plenty of Pawsecco and Pupcorn.
All the best
Stay Fab
Adele
