Yoyo Diets The string gets caught in my teeth Part 1

Michael McIntyre on Dieting


I can sympathize with Michael McIntyre’s metabolism.  Mine has the speed of a constipated snail.  Dieting has to be the most frustrating subject ever.   It has been the bane of my life.

As a teenager I crash dieted and since then the Yoyo diets have been a main annual feature.  Like the title says. The string gets caught in my teeth. Most people have found themselves on one at some time in their lives.  I have tried the following throughout the years with questionable results

  1. The Cabbage Diet- The house smelt like Old McDonald’s Farm. My eyes were watering and I was wincing with the fumes.   I expected to lose an extra few pounds as I had to leg it out to the back garden so many times with perpetual farting.  No such luck.  I can recall losing approx. 3 pounds.  When I was guaranteed at least 7lbs. I was devastated and then in my wisdom decided to go on the Keto Diet.


2. Keto Diet- This is where you can eat your body weight in fat and protein.  I found it to be very unpleasant as I do not enjoy eating or cooking with fat like oil or cream at the best of times.   After one week I gained 5 lbs.  Buzz and Finn left the bedroom once I had hopped off the scales.  I call it a ‘Mood Machine’.  They can both pick up my vibe pretty sharpish and felt that I needed to be alone in my misery.

My dieting tales of woe shall continue tomorrow.

That’s all for now

Stay fab